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After previous petitions calling for marijuana reform have all been thrown out by the Conservative government, Jeremy Corbyn vowed to take the argument to Parliament with him. Since making this claim not much more has been said for marijuana in UK politics. Until now, however, in a bizarre turn of events Cannabis has turned up as a third option on the Labour Leadership Election ballot card. There were previously only two options in the election, the aforementioned Jeremy Corbyn and his former ally turned rival Owen Jones, however, neither have proven particularly competent, leaving many Labour supporters to essentially pick the best of a bad bunch. The addition of cannabis to the Labour leadership race has certainly turned heads, baffling most but pleasing some.

Jerry Garrett, 46, from Sheffield, although admittedly baffled, exclaimed, “I’ve been sort of stuck between Corbyn and Jones, not sure I really want either but this new addition just raises further questions,” before going on to say, “I’ll wait to see how they does in debates, at least they’re likely to get a seat on the train due to their smallish size and are unlikely to make sexist remarks due to the lack of a mouth.”

Lyla, 21, an art student from Manchester Met University claimed, “He’s just such a breath of fresh air you know? Like. I really feel that if him and Corbyn team up they can really change stuff and like totally help poorer people and students but it would also be kinda interesting to see what they do alone.”

Many are still unsure how this unlikely nominee ended up on the ballot, however, it is presumed that when Corbyn was having a party secretary prepare his petition based upon marijuana, it accidentally got mixed up and somehow ended up on the ballot card. A mix up of this proportion is unheard of and some have claimed it is a little too convenient.

September 06, 2016 by Gareth Arnold

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